Is it just me or is the world more moody these days?
Oh yeah. It’s me.
I don’t know what’s going on with me and have been reluctant to share it with you since I try hard to stay upbeat. But darn it, I just can’t seem to get it together right now. I forget things. I snap at people I love. I overreact.
I suppose you could point to my Adderall “vacation” as the cause, but it was happening even before that. In fact, that was one of the reasons I actually TOOK a vacation from stimulants (helped along by new information from Tracy Ware).
I just don’t feel like “me” right now. Everything seems to bring out the worst in me. I am not happy with this person I have reverted to (yes there was a dark time that I was this person almost all the time – yuck).
In between, I managed to turn a big corner: I was in touch with my own wisdom. I could trust my intuition (and did). And now it’s like a delicious dream from which I have awakened. I want to go back to sleep again. I want the “good Linda” back again (sigh).
Well, what’s the lesson here? That life isn’t all a bowl of cherries? That I don’t have it all “together?” That it’s pretty normal to ebb and flow with moods and wisdom and intuition and the rest of it? Probably.
What I do know is that it will return – that elusive sense of well being. I know it. I’ve tasted it, lived it, steeped in it. And I will again. But right now, I just wanna crawl into a little ball and cry. I might just do it. Tears are cathartic for me.
Oh, wait, I have to go to a birthday party in 10 minutes!. Maybe the storm can wait a bit,,, Pictures from the Big Birthday coming up next.